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“Whatever Color”: A Poem About Higgs Boson

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Science!

Are any of you as confused as I am about this whole “God particle” business? Well, hopefully after reading this particular poem by guest poster KC, the once strange Higgs boson will become your new best friend.

Whatever Color (An Ode to Higgs Boson)

Black, white
Yellow or blue
Whatever color
Higgs Boson is too

Higgs Boson comes soft
Higgs boson come hard
Higgs boson comes in packages
And sometimes comes jarred

Higgs Boson is an asshole
And also a nice guy
Higgs Boson are the wings
That lets Higgs get me high

At night I need the boson
To let me lie in bed
But it can only be the Higgs
No other boson can take its stead

Higgs boson is an “icle”
Of which God is part
Higgs boson is the Louvre
And pieces of shitty art

If you ever met Higgs boson
He would shake your hand
She’d also make you a sandwich
And play music in your band

Higgs boson is a pimp daddy
Sometimes even a madam
Put too many Higgs together
And then you gotta atom (add ‘em)

But really Higgs boson is the shit
That keeps us all combined
Higgs boson is your heart
Higgs boson is your mind

So find the boson right for you
Few bosons pass the test
Its mass does matter and despite the chatter
Higgs boson is the best

 



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